The ‘Birthday Dinner’ Dilemma: Should the Birthday Person Pay?

The Two Schools of Thought

1. The “Host” Mentality (Common in older generations)

“It is my party, I invited you, I pay.” Pros: You look like a baller. Cons: You go bankrupt.

2. The “Guest of Honour” Mentality (Common in Gen Z)

“It is my birthday, I am the queen/king, you should pay for me.” Pros: Free dinner! Cons: Your friends might resent paying £50 for your lobster when they are broke.

The Compromise: The “Cover the Head” Rule

The most common modern etiquette is: 1. Everyone pays for their own meal. 2. The group splits the cost of the Birthday Person’s meal.

Example: 10 people. Birthday Person’s meal is £40. The other 9 people pay their own bill + £4.44 each to cover the Birthday Person.

The Exception: The “Set Menu” Trap

If you (the Birthday Person) choose a restaurant with a mandatory £80 set menu, you cannot expect your friends to pay for you and themselves. That is asking too much. If you pick an expensive place, expect to pay for yourself.

Summary

If you are the Birthday Person, bring your wallet just in case. If you are the friend, offer to cover their meal. It’s a nice gesture that costs less than a physical gift.